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How Quality Time Improves Your Relationship

The Power of Quality Time for Relationships

In a recent article about couples activities on the Mornington Peninsula, I wrote…

“3 quarters of couples seeking counselling indicate ‘time’ is a problem.” 

But why?

What is it about spending quality time together that matters?

In this article I unpack 7 top benefits of spending time together.

It might seem simple enough but many couples neglect to spend time together.

Do you need to spend more time together?

Hold that thought!

Read the article first, and make your call at the end.

When Life Gets Busy!

In today’s fast-paced world, couples often find themselves juggling work, responsibilities, and daily routines, leaving little room for meaningful connection with their partners.

So lets look at the benefits of spending quality time together and see how it relates to building and maintaining a strong and healthy relationship.

couple time for a walk
Finding the time: Connected couples make quality time in their relationship

Benefits of Spending Time Together

1. Better Communication

One of the main benefits of spending quality time together as a couple is improved communication. When you have more time for each other, you create a safe, casual and open space for conversations.

These can be natural conversations, or guided conversations, like my ‘Connected Couples Series’ or more structured conversations like the ‘Couples Catch-up’.

It’s in these moments where you can discuss your feelings, concerns, and dreams. Also, the moments in-between the words can be just as important. So be mindful of body-language and silence too.

couples book camp communicate
Improve communication through shared activities

2. Closer Emotional Connection

Quality time leads to more emotional awareness and intimacy. Engaging in shared activities from cooking to cycling to skydiving, leads to rich conversations and heartfelt moments and memories.

Even just simply relaxing together can strengthen the emotional bond between you. From watching a movie, to going camping together, the feeling of being emotionally connected is a source of comfort. It gives you a sense of security, and adds meaning to your relationship.

3. Reduce Stress & Relax

Spending quality time with your partner can be a stress-reliever. Get someone else to take care of the chores or kids for a while and take some time to do something fun and relaxing together. From an easy stroll to playing a game, take your mind off the daily stressors.

Laughter, relaxation, touch and affection all release feel-good hormones that counter the effects of stress.

Remember a time when you were not stressed, like after an awesome holiday. Connect with that moment, and do what you can to get more of those moments in your life. You’ll be glad you did, and appreciate the boost to your overall sense of happiness & well-being.

Reduce stress art gallery couple
Reduce stress by spending quality quiet time together

4. Increase Trust & Feelings of Security

Quality time is vital for building (or rebuilding) trust in the relationship.

In my Save My Marriage Program, when couples are repairing from infidelity & betrayal, we use the Gottmans Trust Building Behaviours concept to choose specific things partners can do to rebuild trust.

A top way, revolves around spending quality time together.

Ask yourself now…

Would spending quality time together, free of distraction be helpful to repair & rebuild trust in my relationship?”

We humans ‘need’ to feel secure in life and in our relationships.

When couples consistently make time for each other, it reinforces the commitment you’ve made to each other.

You are reliable, and that feels good!

If you or your partner had an insecure past – you may value security and feeling safe highly. Why not ask your partner and find out?

5. Create New Shared Memories

Shared memories are all about building fondness and admiration. Being around each other, taking photos, doing things and just looking at each other – all add up to forming new memories.

Special moments and memories are what it’s all about here. So forget Netflix, instead why not explore new places, celebrate something special, perhaps a relationship milestone.

Even facing challenges together, are all great shared experiences that become a part of your unique journey as a couple.

Top tip: Look back on your photos from the past. They are a source of nostalgia. Use the feeling to spur on creating new memories.

Related Resource: Mindfulness Meditation Exercises for Couples

couple kayak river
Create new memories together that will last a lifetime

6. Solve Problems Without the Heartache

Quality time allows couples to be on the same-page more often. Aligning your values, activities and and purpose in life makes it easier to work through issues more easily.

Instead of letting problems simmer, spending time together allows you to have Smooth Conversations, and resolve any conflict with less heartache and turmoil.

When is the last time you had a constructive discussion on purpose with the sole intention of resolving a problem or collaborating on a complex topic?

This deeper level of communication strengthens the connection between you and builds trust & resilience.

What an asset to build for your marriage or relationship!

Follow these tips to be an attentive listener – and hear your partner.

Improve communication couple
Find a common ground or win-win solution & improve communication in your relationship

7. Renewed Romance & Intimacy

Feeling rushed all the time?

Quality time can provide the space for play and passion. Reignite the spark of romance in your relationship by spending more quality time together on this topic.

From date nights, surprise gestures like Love Sparks, and just time to cuddle on the couch; are all reminders of the love you share.

Romance and doing more of what your partner loves is essential to keep the love alive in your relationship.

Ask yourself now – How long has it been since I did something special for my partner?

couple guitar love
Renew intimacy and connection through new hobbies and shared interests

How Will You Spend More Quality Time Together?

At the start of the article I asked:

“Do you or your partner want to spend more time together?”

What do you think now after reading the 7 benefits?

A good idea?Or are you spending so much quality time together your relationship simply cant be any better than it is right now!?

In any case, in a world filled with distractions and demands, it’s easy for us to neglect the importance of spending quality time together.

Perhaps you could benefit from picking one item / benefit to focus on in your relationship over the next week.

What will you choose?

Will it be –

  1. Better Communication
  2. Closer emotional connection
  3. Reduce Stress & Relax
  4. Increase Trust & Feelings of Security
  5. Create New Shared Memories
  6. Solve Problems without the Heartache
  7. Renewed Romance & Intimacy

Pick one and make time in your schedule. Prioritize each other and I’m sure your relationship will be better for it.

When Quality Time is Not Enough...

When spending quality time together isn’t improving your relationship, it’s essential to consider alternatives.

Getting professional help gives you space and a strategic framework to talk through what’s going on sensitively.

From simple life changes though to deeper therapeutic counselling, I help you through the transformation, to achieve your desired goals.

Click here to learn more about Couples Counselling or my popular Save My Marriage Program.

Whenever you’re ready, get in touch from the bookings page and let’s get some traction with a 90 minute discovery session.

jacqueline hogan couples counsellor
Jacqui Hogan - Couples Counsellor

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