Practice Being Mindful of What You're Feeling
Sometimes it’s hard to put a finger on the term to describe how we are feeling. A high level descriptor such as “happy” or “sad” is likely to come to mind first. Yet if you dig a little deeper you might uncover more accurate feelings and emotions that better describe your current mood or behaviour.
Try the New Emotions Explorer
The Wheel of Emotions is still a useful tool, but I’ve also created a new interactive resource called the Emotions Explorer.
Inspired by Brené Brown’s Atlas of the Heart, the Emotions Explorer helps you look at emotions through “places we go” – the emotional spaces we often find ourselves in when we are hurting, overwhelmed, disconnected, comparing ourselves, or trying to make sense of what we feel.
I use this tool in sessions with clients because it can make emotions feel easier to understand and talk about. Instead of trying to pick one word from a wheel, you can explore emotional categories, related feelings, and more precise language for what may be happening inside.
You can try the free version now.
It also includes a quadrant view that maps emotions by energy and pleasantness, inspired by the work of the Yale Center for Emotional Intelligence.
Why Practicing Emotional Awareness Matters
Three Top Reasons Include
Emotional awareness helps you pause and notice what you are really feeling, rather than reacting automatically.
Instead of simply thinking, “I am sad,” you may begin to recognise something more specific, such as:
“I am feeling sad because underneath that, I feel ashamed, rejected and worried.”
This deeper understanding can help you make sense of your emotions, reframe your thinking, and move through difficult feelings in a healthier way.
In my Save My Marriage Program, we explore emotions in more depth and look at how they affect communication, conflict, trust and connection. Emotional awareness is part of healthy self-awareness, and self-awareness is foundational for healthier relationships.
When you understand what you are feeling, you are more able to choose how you respond. This is especially important when repairing a relationship after betrayal, such as infidelity, where emotions can feel intense, confusing and difficult to manage.
Download the Wheel of Emotion
Recognise & understand what you’re feeling. Download the ‘Wheel of Emotion – PDF’
(based on the work of Prof. Robert Plutchik)
Understand What Your Emotions May Be Telling You
Discover Life Values
Our emotions often point towards what matters most.
When an important core value feels overlooked or challenged, we may experience frustration, hurt, disappointment or anger.
Life Values is a deck of 214 cards designed to help you explore your core values, understand your partner more deeply and have more meaningful conversations.
