Have a Conversation About Friendship
Do you consider your partner your friend?
Perhaps the friendship has gone missing in your relationship?
Friendship is often overlooked in relationships, and even in couples therapy it can be overlooked as the focus often goes toward the burning issues, such as communication and managing conflict.
This is why the topic of friendship is an excellent one to get back to and revisit.
After all, the best relationships are built on friendship, so now is a great time to have a conversation about your friendship and develop new ways to renew your friendship.
Gratitude for Years of Friendship
Over the years you have enjoyed each other’s company. What is it specifically about your partner that you enjoy?
Is it their laid back nature, or their sense of adventure? Are they the yin to your yang? Are they organised or spontaneous? What is it about them that makes them your best friend?
Close your eyes and reminisce. Think about the best times you’ve had together as friends.
How does that make you feel?
Let Friendship Take Centre Stage
Friendship is a key component of a healthy relationship. It’s the basis of a growing relationship. It’s what fondness and admiration are built upon. It’s an important ingredient in the chemistry of love and romance
Has the way you think about your partner changed over the years? Perhaps you now see them in a different light, perhaps more in the roles they fill?
Like mother to your children, spouse around the house, and you’ve lost sight of ‘your best friend’?
Has the familiar face you know and love, in some-way become too familiar?
Time to get your friend back. First with new awareness, see your partner first as a friend.
Roles are just things they do, its not who they are. Think about the roles you fill, it’s not who you are.
So, what do friends do?
They talk, they listen, they empathise. They laugh, chat, catchup and talk about what’s going on . They share their desires and dreams. They share their sadness and setbacks too. They are someone you can count on when you need them. They are an ally, they are your friend.
Connect again with your friend. Use the questions below to rediscover your friendship.
Questions to Renew Your Friendship
Sit down and find a comfortable place to have a chat with your partner. Take turns asking each other the following questions:
- In what way could we spend more quality time with each other?
- What topics dear to you, would you like me to show more interest in?
- Do you think I consider your point of view fairly?
- Do I treat you like a good friend? With respect, honesty and integrity?
- In what way could I be there for you more?
- Can you share your hopes and dreams with me?
- Is there anything I say or do that upsets you?
- Do I show my appreciation for our friendship as much as you’d like?
- How can we better honour our friendship in the context of our relationship?
- What’s a time you remember when I was a great friend to you?
