Spending some time to prepare for your first session will help you get the most benefit from counselling.
Taking the time to think about your own individual issues and objectives can help you to get clear on your highest priorities.
My job as a counsellor and coach is to help you find solutions and help you reach your objectives to achieve the outcomes you desire. I have many resources and therapeutic strategies to help you become a better partner and have a happy loving relationship.
My goal is to help you make the necessary adjustments in your life and relationship while upholding your values, beliefs and respecting your boundaries.
When you book your first appointment with me I will send you a 'pre-session pack' to help guide your initial thinking and unpack what's going on for you.
The main aim of couples counselling and relationship coaching is to better understand yourself and your partner and the patterns of interaction between you. Working with me in a safe therapeutic environment is effective for you to apply new knowledge and breakthrough old unhelpful behaviours, beliefs and patterns keeping you stuck.
As your work with me, usually in one of my foundation programs, your thoughts, attitude and beliefs will shift. Having a sense of clarity as new possibilities arise makes it easier to become the partner you aspire to be.
To create improvement in your relationship you need:
First, let’s talk about time. It simply ‘takes time’ to create a relationship that thrives and flourishes.
Spending time on your relationship is a smart investment that can pay ‘dividends’ for years to come. In the short term however changes will have to be made on how you spend ‘free time’ to get the biggest changes in the shortest amount of time. This includes making sacrifices to your personal or professional time.
The second point is about discomfort. The brain likes comfort and keeping things nice and easy for you, making going outside your ‘comfort zone’ feel difficult, especially for extended periods of time.
However trying new ways of thinking and doing things, leads to new rewards. Listening and being curious instead of ‘raising your voice and defending’ could feel emotionally risky or hurtful in the beginning; but by taking a ‘risk’ and exploring entirely different ways of communicating can elevate your relationship to a whole new level!
The third challenge you will face is the energy required to push through the discomfort and the effort required to sustain your improvement over time. Unpacking your feelings, emotions and ‘life’ can be challenging and emotional. Changing habits and behaviour requires a special effort. Making a concerted effort to being more attentive, understanding, giving, grateful, appreciative etc, all takes effort. The rewards however can be life changing.
Finally, improving your reaction or sensitivity to problems is another challenging area for many couples. For example, if one person is hypersensitive to criticism and his/her partner is hypersensitive to feeling ignored, it will take effort to improve their sensitivity instead of hoping the partner will stop ignoring or criticising.
Jacqui works in person and online via phone and video call. To get started, call today for a free short chat and arrange a time that suits you for your first session.